Be afraid, be very afraid. My name is Mongo. I run security here at Chocula HQ. If you get in the way, then I get you out of the way. That is my job, and I have an astounding amount of strength that ensures it gets done. I've seen you with your 'No fear' shirts. Competitive slogans flaunted by a gutless insecure loser, insinuating that he can back them up.

    I don't care if you're trying to cause trouble or not, if I see you walk by and so much as look at me, I'll wipe that "I'm quarterback for a high school team" look off your face, and give you the same respect for authority that you gave the chess club president last week. For every wedgie by your hand, is another reason for me to teach you your limitations. Mongo is a force to be reckoned with, and I will make my message heard.

The following is a message from Chocula Enterprises:
If you are a jock, please feel free to walk by our building and look at Mongo.